Deep within the soul of my womb lies the memories of a thousand lifetimes of pain. As I transition from mother to crone, I am finding that this journey has its challenges. It is not a journey for the faint hearted, yet the option of choice is denied, it is a rite of passage. It is the gift of healing through wisdom and experience.
My wombds (wounds within my womb) that are not yet healed are showing me that there is sacred work to be done.
My wombd story is about an unbridled deep festering rage that arises when I am shut down, ignored, dismissed, pushed aside and/or minimised. A sword wielding Warrior Goddess appears in situations when men show up for me in this way, especially my partner.
I am 50 on Friday and as I progress through my BORN DAY (not birthday) week I see my wise crone waiting for me with open arms, her wisdom shows me that only I can minimise and devalue mySELF. It is my story around ‘HIS’ actions that create the judgement. I haven’t yet integrated that revelation. It is a work in progress.
I recently found mySELF in a situation where I was shut down and blocked, I have been struggling with hormonal issues and haven’t been the easiest person to live with as my sword wielding Warrior Goddess who had been rather active was up for a fight. She is assertive and strong and I would say somewhat aggressive. My partner calls her Russell Crow from South Park, fighting around the world, reluctantly, with a smile on my face, I would have to agree with him.
It is very common to feel angry when someone denies you the opportunity to express yourSELF freely (like facebook and youtube 😉, it appears that I might be heading for my second youtube ban). Feeling heard and valued in itself is all that is often required. There is something magical that is created when the offending party listens without defending their position. It gives you both the opportunity to complete this cycle of exchange and shows you all aspects that reflects back to you. There is resolution in this.
It takes an emotionally strong man or woman to be able to listen to the wounded party without defending your position. When there is intense emotion and emotional daggers are thrown your way it is very important to hold space for the other party and listen without interrupting. Say nothing, be present and know that this is an opportunity of healing and transformation.
Three of Swords knocked on my door showing me that there is pain and heartache presenting itself which is my major block. This pain can be overcome if I am honest with mySELF and confront it head on.
MEET YOUR INTERNAL WISDOM…
I invite you to explore the work of Byron Katie. The Work is meditation. It is a method of inquiry born directly out of Byron Katie’s experience. This practice allows you to access the wisdom that always exists within you.
Every time you do The Work you are becoming enlightened to who and what you are, the true nature of being. To question what you believe is an amazing gift to give yourself, and you can have it all the days of your life. The answers are always inside you, just waiting to be heard.
Well you eloquently and expressively explained exactly how I am feeling, what I am also struggling with, being heard when you innerstand so much, but instead I am blocked, by those closest, and by my own soul’s lessons still to be learned or overcome. These experiences still deserve gratitude, for our growth, much love to you friend xxx